My New Plaid Pants

As everyone who reads this blog is already aware, I’ve gotten back into painting. I stuck my toe back into it tepidly, using small 3x5 inch canvases and continuing with acrylics. Acrylics are an excellent choice for new painters for several reasons: they are relatively inexpensive, dry fast, provide a “depth” unlike water colors, and are water soluble. I’ve never worked with any other type of paint except acrylics, but wanted to move to oil paints for a number of reasons, but I have to admit the main reason is that they are considered the “artist” paints – you aren’t considered a painter until you paint in oil.

I assume this is because oil paint itself stinks, the mixers stink even more, and the cleaning solutions stink the most. It’s the smell that makes a true artist… either that or that you inevitably end up with paint on your hands and cloths that no amount of turpentine will remove. I don’t have a dedicated artist’s studio, unless you count my dining room table as a studio, so painting in oils would really allow the olfactory sensors to kick into high gear throughout my house.

Still, the allure of being a real artist is like a siren call that can’t be resisted. I trudged off to the local art supply store a few months ago with a list of paints to purchase. After returning home with a shocking $150 receipt I discovered the following: oil paints aren’t cheap, they require a bunch of additional supplies (linseed oil, turpentine, etc) that acrylics don’t require, and it’s true they do smell to high heaven. Smell as in close the windows, paint for a half hour and you’ll be as high as you used to get in high school. I now understand why artists are crazy… it’s not from the emotional rollercoaster the artwork takes you down, but the fumes. Oils and I didn’t make it for even a small finished painting; however I did feel awfully silly the rest of that day.

Since I wanted to be buried with both my ears attached, unlike Van Gogh, I needed an alternative. After scouring the internet for what seemed like hours on end (but actually took only a couple minutes – most of the time filled by waiting for my PC to boot up) I discovered a new type of oil paint – water soluble. New is relative but apt; water soluble oil paints have only existed for mere decades unlike when the great masters transitioned from egg tempura to oil around 1500.

Off to the art store again, and another $150 for new paints. Best $150 I’ve spent all year, not counting the plaid pants I bought at Overstock of course. Those are some sweet pants, I have to say… I might even make a painting of them.